Turning 30 is not quite what you expect. In the lead up to turning 30 I honestly believed my youth was over, my young free and single life would be a distant memory and my fun years were coming to an end. This belief came from society and the expectations I (and others) had put on myself to ‘behave’ like a 30 year old. That includes things like;
– Working my way up the career ladder
– Having a husband
– Being too old to experiment with drugs
– Settling in one place as opposed to travelling
Life in my 30s has been quite the opposite to every belief I had, and so far, it’s been my best years yet! Here are 5 surprising things I have learn since turning 30.
1. You Do What You Want Because You Stop Caring What People Think
Yes obviously you can also do what you want in your 20s too, but we are still seeking approval on big decisions from elders. Or feeling worried about going against the grain too much. Whether it’s family, colleagues or friends. In your 30s however, the only approval you seek is from yourself. You care less about what other people think and although you may make decisions that other people don’t agree with or understand, you do them anyway because your decisions are for you and ultimately you don’t care.
I am sure you have already heard of the book; The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A F*ck, go read it. Now! It will change your life.
2. You Don't Have To Do What Society Expects Of You
When I was in my early 20s I assumed I would be married, have kids and own a house in the same village as my parents before my mid 30s. That could not be further from my current situation of no husband, no children, and no house. I don’t even live in the same country for more than 3 months at a time. It’s fine if you do want those things and have them. My issue lies with the societal pressure that you SHOULD have those things in your 30s and if you don’t, you’re failing your 30s. But it’s simply not true or necessary. There are other ways to live your 30s if you want to.
Climbing the corporate ladder and having a long-term career is another great example of society telling us we should have and want these things. But they are not for everyone and that’s okay. If that’s you, read our post: What If I Don’t Want A Career? 3 Simple Alternatives for some great suggestions and advice!
The key takeaway here is if you don’t want to follow the societal norm, that doesn’t make you weird or strange, there’s loads of people that feel the same. You just gotta find your group!
3. You're Allowed To Be Single In Your 30s
When I was in my 20s I dated someone in their 30s and people seemed to think there must be something wrong with him if he’s got to 30 and not been wifed up yet. There’s a stigma attached to being single in your 30s. But it’s better to be single than to be in a relationship with the wrong person. Sometimes it’s just the way life pans out, if you end up single in your 30s, 40s, 50s and so on it doesn’t mean anything and it’s not a reflection of you.
I am coming across more and more people that are choosing to be single in their 30s, wanting to be alone and learn and love themselves, and that’s really beautiful.
4. The World Is A Lot Bigger Than We Realise
In your 30s, you stop sweating the small stuff because you realise there’s a lot more other shit going on in the world and what you thought you cared about is actually pretty trivial in comparison. In my 20s I was definitely worrying about dumb things like how many likes my Facebook status had or being upset if I didn’t get invited to a party. You realise these things don’t actually matter.
Because you care less about smaller things you have the capacity to understand more of what is going on outside of your little bubble, you appreciate much more and your world opens up.
5. You Can Date Across 3 Decades
Oh yes, the dating pool just got bigger! If you want to date someone in their 20s, go for it. Fancy dating someone in their 40s? Join the club! It’s a great decade for dating and if you revert to point 1, you also will not care if anyone judges you for dating some 10+ years older.
So there you have it, 5 surprising things I have learnt since turning 30. Do you agree? Are your 30s your best years yet? Is there anything else you have learnt that you didn’t expect since being in your 30s? Share it in the comments below!
Amber x
P.s if you’re nervous about turning 30 or not sure what to expect, you should read our post; How Does It Really Feel To Turn 30?