There’s no denying that getting your heart broken is the worst, and unfortunately it is something we are probably all going to experience. But, it helps shape us as individuals and aids in our personal growth. It’s just part of life and we kinda need to embrace it.
I am not going to sit here and give you 5 tips on getting over an ex, because I am not qualified to do that, nor do I believe that following a step by step guide for getting over someone really works. We all react differently to this type of hurt and each couple’s situation is unique. But what I am going to tell you is that firstly, you are going to be okay. And secondly, you can (and should) embrace your breakup, it’s all part of the healing process, and I would know because I have been there.
How To Embrace Your Breakup
A Fresh Start
This is the best part about getting dumped, you now have an opportunity to do whatever you want, you can completely reinvent yourself if you choose to. I don’t just mean get a haircut and buy a new wardrobe. What about that trip to Australia you have always wanted to take but your ex was holding you back? You can now move to the city you’ve always wanted to. Or start the business you’ve been planning in your head. Now is the time!
This is a fresh start for you. You have the space and time to plan your next move, you can try different things and figure out what you do and don’t want without having to consider anyone else. That is exciting and a great way to embrace your breakup.
Time To Be Selfish
When you are going through a breakup, you need to keep yourself busy. And it’s totally fine to do what you need to if it makes life even slightly more bearable. If you want to splurge on expensive shoes, treat yourself to a facial, book a holiday. Whatever brings colour back into your life is worth it. Doing these things isn’t going to change how you feel about your breakup, but time is a healer and keeping yourself busy doing activities you enjoy will make the time go quicker.
If there was ever an excuse to be over the top and spend money without thinking, it’s when you’re going through a breakup. It doesn’t matter if that seems superficial, this isn’t about who you are as a person, this is about making life more bearable when you’re going through a difficult time.
Focus On What You Can Change
At the end of the day you can’t change how someone feels and the sooner you accept this, the faster you can move on. So instead, focus on what you can change. I started focusing more on my business, I picked up a side job, I moved house and chose to live on my own, not gonna lie I did change my hair too. Deciding and doing all of these things myself really empowered me and reminded me that life does goes on.
More Time On Your Hands
This probably doesn’t sound like a positive to you, but hear me out. Someone who used to take priority in your life and take up a good chunk of your time is no longer able to do that. This is great for your other relationships as you can now spend more time with your family, friends, old flames, whoever you want to.
What about that hobby you’ve been thinking about but not started yet? Now is the time! There are so many benefits to being single, check out my post: 3 Things I Wish I Could Tell My Past Single Self.
I would really recommend following Sarah Blondin’s guided meditation to help with your break up journey.
Positivity Breeds Positivity
And I don’t need to tell you what the opposite is. It really is true, the more positive thoughts you can have the better you will feel and thus the cycle begins. In a time when it’s hard to feel positive, even if you don’t believe it, having positive thoughts and language is exactly what you should do and eventually you will believe it and it will be true. Remind yourself; you are doing great.
There Is No Magic Cure, But...
There is not one thing in particular that is going to make the hurt disappear and the breakup any easier. But if you do find the magic cure, pop it in the comments below for the rest of us please! You don’t have to sit at home by yourself, watching Bridget Jones and eating 4 tubs of ice cream whilst crying into your pillow. There is an alternative that is better for your mental and physical wellbeing. It’s a combination of time, processing, healing and growing and by choosing to take a positive approach to your break up, it will help aid in your journey.
Take care, Amber x
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