I’ll be honest, this post took me a long time to write, I kept leaving it and coming back to it. Then I deleted it, then un-deleted it. Talking about sensitive subjects is always a risk, and I was worried I wouldn’t do this topic justice, but here goes.
We live in a world now where anything can gain popularity very quickly thanks to the internet and social media. I’m not saying Feminism wasn’t popular before, The Suffragettes started in 1903 and we’ve all heard about that.
But a few years ago I was noticing how ‘Feminist’ came up a lot more than I was used to, as if the term had suddenly gained popularity. Features in news articles, conversations amongst friends, book shops selling female-only authors, #feminista. There is now an unspoken societal pressure, especially as a female, to be an ‘active feminist’. Truthfully, I would not call myself a Feminist.
Now, if you’re like me, anything that gets pushed on to me, without me making the decision myself about it, often makes me want to do the opposite. You’ll see that in a number of our other blog posts here talking about our opinions of marriage, children, careers and even social media.
Don’t get me wrong, I know sexism exists because I have experienced it myself, and of course I am completely against sexism, but do I need to be a bona fide ‘Feminist’ to prove that and support my gender?
What Is A Feminist?
When you type into google; ‘Define Feminist‘ the results show:
“A person who supports feminism”
Immediately I thought this must be me because I support feminism, yet I don’t feel like I can authentically call myself a ‘Feminist’. As with anything there is a stereotype attached to a feminist. If you google, ‘what does a feminist look like?‘, it shows lots of women holding placards during a protest, but I’ve never been to a protest.
I continued my search with; ‘Define Feminism’: “The advocacy of women’s rights on the basis of the equality of the sexes.”
Basically, a wordy way of saying; supporting women’s rights for equality. Now this I can relate to, of course I want and support equal rights for women. So, if I support Feminism and that’s the definition of a feminist, why do I still feel uncomfortable about calling myself a Feminist?
Further searches bring up terms including, ‘on the front line, patriarchal, the war against.’ These sound ‘radical’, therefore if you are not behaving in a radical way towards feminism, you can’t be a feminist and that can be off-putting to the majority of people.
Society makes us believe that to be a ‘Feminist’ we have to do and act a certain way. You have to live, eat and breath feminism to be a feminist and therefore support equal rights for women. But that’s just not true.
Am I 'Failing' As A Feminist If I...
– Read books written by male authors?
– Get my boyfriend to take the bins out?
– Seek out the help of a male when lifting something heavy?
– Have a male fix my computer problems?
– Let my boyfriend drive 99% of the time?
– Use my femininity to get what I want out of a situation?
– Have never participated in a rally or protest for feminism/women’s rights?
– Choose not to speak up when I am abroad and the locals will only speak to my boyfriend?
That is and all of these things would suggest that I do not meet the criteria to be a true ‘feminist’. But really it’s just a label, and there are different ways I show my support towards equal rights for women. Such as, giving to equal rights charities, educating men on the rights of women,
You Can Still Support Feminism And Not Be A Feminist
It’s not about calling yourself a Feminist, it’s about championing equality for everyone. Again when I type into Google, ‘Define Equality‘ the results show, ‘The state of being equal, especially in status, rights, and opportunities.’ Equality is a broad term, and that’s what I like about it. It does not specifically refer to genders but includes and is not limited to; race, sexual orientation, religion, age, culture etc. To me, it makes more sense to support Equality for everyone, rather than purely females. Yes, females need to be heard, but there are lots of people that also need to be heard.
You'll Never Be The Best And That's Okay
We live in a world of sexism, racism, poverty, global warming, homophobia, war and the list continues. As individuals we can’t do everything all the time, but however you choose to make the world a better place is better than not doing anything at all.
It doesn’t matter how or what we identify ourselves as, what matters are our actions.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on Feminism and this post, please put your comments below.
Amber x
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