Pregnancy can be tough on friendships. And you may find your newly pregnant friend is driving you crazy! You also have to accept that this new addition to your friend’s life has just pushed you down the pecking order. And you’re not used to it right? There are also plenty of changes that can happen to a friendship once your friend is pregnant. Which can feel difficult to initially accept when those changes weren’t your idea or doing, but you have to get on board with them.
What is it about your friends pregnancy that is driving you crazy? Maybe all your friend talks about now is her pregnancy. Or perhaps they have become very cautious and no longer want to leave the house or do anything. And were they your ‘going out out‘ friend and now you have no one to get silly drunk with? Is your friend super hormonal and always on the edge of tears? Whatever your reason for your pregnant friend driving you crazy, I’m here for it. Because I also have first hand experience with my sister and friends leaving me feeling like this too.
My Pregnant Friend Is Driving Me Crazy What Do I Do?
First of all, you might feel guilty for feeling this way and for typing into google ‘my pregnant friend is driving me crazy.’ But don’t feel bad. You are only human and entitled to your feelings. We can’t control how we feel and as I mentioned before, a pregnancy can be testing on a friendship so it’s no wonder you’re having these feelings. But what can you do about it?
Soz Hun, It's Your Problem
The first thing to realise is that this is your issue and not theirs. So accept that and don’t tell your pregnant friend that they are driving you crazy. It’s not their fault or their problem. People change, life happens and this is part and parcel of you dealing (or not) and adapting to someones new life.
Seek Space
It’s okay to give yourself some space from your friend. In fact if anyone is annoying you be it a family member, partner or friend you are entitled to space. But don’t blank your pregnant friend completely. This is a vulnerable and scary life stage for them. They would appreciate any support they can get.
Lean On Other Friends
But under no circumstances should you bitch or moan about your pregnant friend to your other friends for obvious reasons. You are allowed to mix up your friendship group or even make new friends. But be careful not to allow your feelings of your friend’s pregnancy ruin your friendship completely.
Meet In A Group
If your friend constantly talks about their pregnancy and that annoys you, try meeting up in a group instead of 1:1 to take some of the pressure off. You can spend time with them as well as
Play Nicely And Take Turns
One thing I found difficult was not being able to contribute to pregnancy and baby conversations. If you haven’t had a baby yourself it can be tricky to know what to say. Therefore, give your friend time to talk about their unborn baby and then casually switch the conversation to something you can both join in on.
This Won't Last Forever
This is a great reminder of how life is constantly changing and one day your friend will no longer be pregnant. Instead, they will have a baby that is exhausting, and a welcome break with friends will be exactly what they need.
A New Opportunity For You Too
If your pregnant friend doesn’t want to do as many activities due to morning sickness for example, you could always do them by yourself. Read our post, How To Embrace Spending Time Alone. This could be the perfect opportunity to start a new hobby!
Accept It
I found that accepting my friend’s pregnancy and accepting the change that comes with that was a big part of feeling less annoyed by the situation and them. Embrace this amazing life stage, it will be gone before you know it.
Fulfil Your Friendship Duties Regardless
If at the moment, being around your pregnant friend is too much for you to handle, there are other ways to show your support and that you still care. You could organise a baby shower, send her care packages or drop round freezer meals. Have you thought about reading up on what going through a pregnancy is like? It might help you to understand the changes they are going through better.
The reality is none of this may help how you are feeling towards your pregnant friend right now. And there could be other reasons you’re feeling like this, perhaps you find it difficult to be happy for her. If so, I recommend reading Why It’s Okay To Not Be Happy For Your Pregnant Friend. But this doesn’t get you off the hook entirely, because if you want to remain friends it’s your responsibility to help nurture the friendship through this new phase.
However, not all friendships stand the test of time and that is part of life. If this has happened to you, please have a read of our post; Why We Lose Friends And How To Handle It as it may help you navigate what can be an incredibly sad loss.
Hopefully that is not the case though and you manage to deal with your feelings and find ways of coping with your pregnant friend that is driving you crazy. Let me know!
Amber x